A Re-affirmation of Life Castle Style
by glo1196
Summary: He stayed, and he risked it all for her. Now all she wants is to feel him near her, to touch him, kiss him and feel what it is like to love him as he deserves.


**Disclaimer- not mine never will be, but a girl can wish.**

**One shot- that had to get out before the finale…the way I wanted it to be. Sorry for any mistakes, they are all mine, and since I wanted this out I apologize if there are to many mistakes. This was sort of stream of consciousness. Thanks for reading!**

**Re-affirmation of life the Castle way.**

Their fingers intertwine between the seats of her cruiser, as they leave the bomb scene. She can't stop herself from tracing each of his fingers as she drives, mapping each knuckle and lifeline. She needs to touch him to prove to herself that she is still here with him. The tips of her fingers burn with the need to show him everything she is feeling, because there are no words she can use to describe her emotions.

"He stayed," echoes through the recesses of her mind as if on replay. Her fingers continue to map the contours of his hand while she steals glances and soft touches as they near the loft.

"Castle," her voice is soft, unsure, and needy. He is the wordsmith; she can never find right ones. She shows it with her actions, and she wants desperately to show him right now.

He looks over at her and his eyes are brimming with unshed tears. The blue so clear and bright she is reminded of the sky on a beautiful, cloudless autumn day, and her breathe hitches.

"Oh Castle," she barely gets out as she pulls into the underground parking garage under his building. His death grip on her hand keeps him rooted until she pulls into the space he has reserved just for her.

Castle's head drops to his chest. His voice is raw and broken. "Don't leave me, Beckett. Don't ever do that to me again. Never ask me to walk away. I'll never be able to walk away."

Kate sprints up and straddles his lap easing slowly into his lap. Her arms wrap gently around his neck as she cradles his head into the crook of her neck; trying to soothe the turmoil she saw raging in his eyes. Running her nails gently through his hair as she tries to mold herself to his body offering herself to him for comfort. This man who was willing to give u everything for her.

"You stayed Castle. You stayed with me. We could have died. There's Alexis, Martha the boys, everybody." Her body rocks them gently. She pulls away from him and their foreheads touch. Her fingers trace the outer shell of his ear, and down his neck as she gently peppers kisses on the tip of his nose, his forehead and finally his lips. "No one, Castle. Has ever done anything like that for me. I never thought I would ever have anyone who would be willing to do that for me, who could love me that way."

"Always," he manages to whisper as so many emotions coarse through him. His fingers instinctively tighten around her hips grinding her against him. "I need you Kate. I don't want to be in a life without you in it."

She thread her fingers through his soft hair, as she opens her mouth against his, tracing her tongue over his lips, feeling the sharp hitch in his breath as he tries to control himself.

"I love you, Castle." She whispers into his mouth as she continues to kiss him. "It's always been you, it will always be you."

His tongue plunges aggressively into her mouth as his hands wander over her hips and slide roughly into her hair. His touch turns possessive; fingers clutch the soft curls angling her where he wants her. An uncontrollable shiver courses through her as his hand fall to her jean clad thigh, tracing a slow torturing line upwards. Drawing in a strangled breath, she moans his name.

Her heart pounds wildly in her ears, her skin burns with desire, every inch of her consumed by this desperate fiery arousal. Kate nuzzles her nose into the crook of his neck, her tongue darting out to taste the salty tang of his sweat. It was now his turn to shudder as her lips and teeth trail down the slope of his neck to his shirt collar.

Nimble fingers start work on the buttons of his blue shirt as her mouth devours ever inch of new exposed skin. He savors the sensation as her hands slide their way up his chest and across his shoulders sliding his shirt from his shoulders. Her nails rake across his chest leaving a trail of raised skin behind them. Marking him as hers as her tongue lathes his nipple.

"Fuck, Kate you've got to stop." He growls at her even as his fingers search for the buttons of her black Hensley.

"No, Castle. Please." She begs as her hands travel down her body and he watches her undo her jeans. She shimmies awkwardly out of them drawing her skimpy lace underwear with them. With her shirt undone and her jeans now puddled at his feet Castle looses all sense of decency and hungrily begins to feast on her body.

He has never been so thankful for a front clasp bra as he releases her breasts and devours the pebbled nipple with his mouth, rolling the other nipple between his fingers. She's already coiled tight before his lips drew her nipple into his mouth, now she is totally out of control. His hands slips down her body cupping her hot center as slides his fingers between her folds; and rubs her nub with an accuracy that only he has ever possessed for her.

"So wet," he growls against her neck, "You're Mine Kate, mine…you can't die on me."

He bites down on her nipple and she moans his name between heavy breathes. Then he slides two fingers deep inside of her. He wants to see her writhe over him in pleasure. He wants her wild and uncontrolled because only he can do this to her.

Her body undulates above him as she slowly rides his long, thick fingers. The only thing keeping them from being exposed fully is her long hair and open Hensley shirt hanging loosely on her body.

She wants him in her. She wants him more than she has ever physically needed anyone. Reaching for his pants he grabs her wrists, pulling her hands away from him.

"Not yet," he growls between clenched teeth. "Not here." Reaching up he pulls the shirt free of her shoulders exposing her completely to him. A thin sheen of sweat shimmers over her body. Her body dances against his nimble fingers, and she's begging him for her release.

Castle slides his finger out of her as she whimpers her disappointment. He reaches over the seat of the car and hands her, her trench coat. She slides her arms through and he opens the door and scoots out from under her, as he puts on his shirt. She ties the belt as she gets out of the car. With his arm planted low on her back, they move towards the elevators.

Once inside he corners her against the back of the empty elevator and raises her leg over his hip. The coat open enough that he has access to her, but his body blocks her from possible prying eyes. He slides his fingers between her lips and enters her as she bites down hard on his shoulder to keep herself from moaning. She hears the elevator ping and the door open, but she doesn't care. Whoever it was decided not to board.

Finally it's their floor and she slides her leg off his hip. His hands are all over her, and by the time they are at his door, he has untied the coat and it is puddle at her feet, as she stands bare in his hallway, kissing any part of him she can get.

They tumble recklessly into the apartment and she falls to her knees in front of him. She yanks down his pants and takes him deep in her mouth before he knows what hit him. Castle leans back against the door as her mouth devours him, her hands cup his sack, and she's gloriously naked before him. It is too much to process in light of everything that happened today and he feels the tightness in his groin coil tightly. His hands in her hair encourage her to move faster. Her wet lips feel so good around him; he lets out a feral growl.

She moans when she takes him in deeper and he almost looses it. He pulls her away and the lack of sensation is overwhelming. He needs to be in her, to feel her wrapped tightly around him.

Pulling her up he moves them to the closest flat surface, the dining room table and lies her down on it. He lifts a leg and runs his tongue across the back of her knee to the apex between her legs, then places it on his shoulder. Taking the other leg he proceeds to do the same agonizing dance with his tongue. She lifts her hip as he approaches where she wants his lips to go.

Her eyes flutter shut her as she savors the all-consuming feelings she is experiencing. She feels his warm breath swirl over her wet center sending chills through her body and tightening the coil deep within her. He is so close she lifts her hips towards him and moans as his five o'clock shadow scrapes against her inner thigh, and she finally feels his tongue brush gently against her.

She feels his finger spread her bare lips. "You're so wet, Kate."

Before she can make a snarky remark he runs his tongue across her wetness, obliterating any semblance of thought. Castle's tongue swirls around her swollen nub, teasing and torturing her further. Sucking her it into his mouth and flicking his tongue over it until she chanting his name breathlessly, while her finger claw the edge of the table.

Her hips buck instinctively and she gasps for breath with each flick oh his tongue or nip of his teeth. Arching her back she feels her intense orgasm overtake her. Castle is relentless and continues his assault until she has three more shattering orgasms. Then she starts begging him to enter her.

Castle pulls away from her and starts kissing his way back up her body. At her breasts he nips and plays for a few seconds, then continues to her lips. He kisses her and she hungrily returns his kisses, enjoying the taste of herself on his lips. Her tongue delves into his mouth needing his everywhere at once.

"What do you want Kate?" he asks her as he runs his fingers up and down her body. "Tell, me what you really want."

"You, I want you, Rick" whimpers between breathy moans. Castle rubs himself against her wet center then sheaths himself deep inside her. She stiffens then grinds her hips against him as she hears him growl. She reaches up and pulls his body down to her. She begs him, "Castle, make me feel alive. Make it hard, fast and hot. Please, make me yours."

Barely pulling himself out of her then plunges deep into her forcefully causing a moan to escape her lips. He pulls back and does it again and again, as she starts to squirm against him, hoping to speed things up. He buries himself to the hilt over and over, then faster and harder each time. Her nails rake across his back as her orgasm starts to intensify. He is driving himself wildly into her and she is meeting him thrust for thrust.

Her body shakes with want below him. His hands fondle her breasts and pull on her nipples. Her body bows under him as she arches up into his touch. Her eyes bore into him as her orgasm reaches an unbearable peak. She shatters spectacularly around him taking him with her as her walls tighten and milk him. He collapses into her panting her name. He captures her lips once they catch their breath and gently kisses her, with him still sheathed deep inside her.

They catch their breath before he helps her off the table, slowly leading her through his office to their bedroom, and through to their bathroom to the immense shower. Castle turns on all the jets and tests the water.

He walks her slowly into the hot spray, adjusting the jet for her maximum satisfaction. Kate can't keep her hands off him, already soaping his body and running her fingers across his chest. Her fingers drink him in, as she slowly tries to memorize every inch of his body. Her soapy fingers wrap around his length. "Kate, you got to give me a little time to recharge, love." He growls as she continues her explorations. Her lips gently caress his chest making him shiver with want; her fingers follow the soapy suds trailing down his body.

He turns her around as a dangerous growl escapes between his lips. "The things you do to me Beckett." No woman has had this much control over my body." She giggles but that is cut short as he turns her roughly around against the backside of the shower. He grinds himself excruciatingly slow between her warm pliable cheeks and he hears her gasp in surprise.

His body traps her between him and the wet wall of the shower. She can feel him harden quickly against her ass and she stutters his name as he lifts one of her legs and sheaths him deeply inside her again. She pants his name semi coherently as he grinds and slaps his body against her. His fingers wrap around her waist and slip down between her legs. Nimbly he fingers her until she loses control begging him for more. Her walls are clenching uncontrollably around him and her body is quivering in response to wave after wave of orgasms. With one final thrust he empties himself in her and collapses with her wrapped around him. The water cascades over them both, soothing the tired muscles and spent bodies.

They finally fall exhausted into their bed, their bodies still damp from the shower.

He holds her close, as she tries to mold herself around his body. Her fingers trail every curve and dip of his body as she tries to memorize him as he slowly drifts off to sleep. She still can't believe this beautiful, wonderful; man stayed with her, and risked his life so that she would not die alone. A tear escapes as she contemplates all he would have given up for her. Running her fingers gently through his hair, pulling it softly it away from his eyes she smiles at him. He looks so young and innocent as he sleeps.

"I love you, Castle. Always." She whispers as sleep and exhaustion finally overtakes her. She misses the smile that that forms on a certain handsome author face, as he mouths "Always," back.

**For the certain gentleman at the 12****th**** precinct, who thought that I should write how Beckett thanks Castle for staying with her. It became so much more though…hope you enjoy!**

P1236846


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